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Chef Jon’s Specials
Shucks 119th & Pacific (Boardwalk)
Starts Friday
Cajun Shrimp Alfredo
Chef Jon's Lobster Roll
Shucks Legacy (168th & Center)
Starts Friday
Chef Jon's Lobster Roll
Asian Glazed Jumbo Scallops
Baileys Breakfast & Lunch
Dad's Favorite Omelet
Santa Ana Scramble
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ABSOLUTELY FRESH SEAFOOD MARKETS:
Swordfish steaks
15.99/lb
Fantastic on the grill. Try dotting with butter, on the grill, along with salt and pepper, then give it a squeeze of fresh lime when you plate it up!
Fresh From Prince Edward Island, Eastern Canada --
Mussels 3.99
White wine, sliced onion, chopped garlic, salt and pepper – remember to grab a baguette.
Steam the mussels, plus above ingredients, covered, for about 7 minutes, or until mussels are open.
Enjoy with some fresh cilantro on top! Don’t forget that bottle of Sauvignon Blanc, either.
18th &
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When you have to visit a public bathroom, you usually find a line of women, so you smile politely and take your place. Once it's your turn, you check for feet under the stall doors. Every stall is occupied.
Finally, a door opens and you dash in, nearly knocking down the woman leaving the stall. You get in to find the door won't latch. It doesn't matter, the wait has been so long you are about to wet your pants! The dispenser for the modern "seat covers"(invented by someone's Mom, no doubt) is handy, but empty.
You would hang your purse on the door hook, if there was one, but there isn't - so you carefully, but quickly drape it around your neck, (Mom would turn over in her grave if you put it on the FLOOR!), yank down your pants, and assume " The Stance." In this position your aging, toneless (God I should have gone to the gym!!!) thigh muscles begin to shake You'd love to sit down, but you certainly hadn't taken time to wipe the seat or lay toilet paper on it, so you hold "The Stance".
To take your mind off your trembling thighs, you reach for what you discover to be the empty toilet paper dispenser. In your mind, you can hear your mother's voice saying, "Honey, if you had tried to clean the seat, you would have KNOWN there was no toilet paper!" Your thighs shake more. You remember the tiny tissue that you blew your nose on yesterday - the one that's still in your purse. (Oh yeah, the purse around your neck, that now, you have to hold up trying not to strangle yourself at the same time). That will have to do. You crumple it in the puffiest way possible. It's still smaller than your thumbnail. Someone pushes your door open because the latch doesn't work.
The door hits your purse, which is hanging around your neck in front of your chest, and you and your purse topple backward against the tank of the toilet. "Occupied!" you scream, as you reach for the door, dropping your precious, tiny, crumpled tissue in a puddle on the floor, lose your footing altogether, and slide down directly onto the TOILET SEAT. It is wet of course. You bolt up, knowing all too well that it’s too late. Your bare bottom has made contact with every imaginable germ and life form on the uncovered seat because YOU never laid down toilet paper - not that there was any, even if you had taken time to try. You know that your mother would be utterly appalled if she knew, because, you're certain her bare bottom never touched a public toilet seat because, frankly, dear, "You just don't KNOW what kind of diseases you could get".
By this time, the automatic sensor on the back of the toilet is so confused that it flushes, propelling a stream of water like a fire hose against the inside of the bowl that sprays a fine mist of water that covers your butt and runs down your legs and into your shoes. The flush somehow sucks everything down with such force that you grab onto the empty toilet paper dispenser for fear of being dragged in too At this point, you give up. You're soaked by the spewing water and the wet toilet seat. You're e-x-h-a-u-s-t-e-d. You try to wipe with a gum wrapper you found in your pocket and then slink out inconspicuously to the sinks.
You can't figure out how to operate the faucets with the automatic sensors, .....so you wipe your hands with spit and a dry paper towel and walk past the line of women still waiting. You are no longer able to smile politely to them. A kind soul at the very end of the line points out a piece of toilet paper trailing from your shoe.(Where was that when you NEEDED it??)You yank the paper from your shoe, plunk it in the woman's hand and tell her warmly, "Here, you just might need this".
As you exit, you spot your hubby, who has long since entered, used, and left the men's restroom. Annoyed, he asks, "What took you so long, and why is your purse hanging around your neck?" ................ This is dedicated to women everywhere who deal with a public restrooms (rest??? you've GOT to be kidding!!). It finally explains to the men what really does take us so long. It also answers their other commonly asked questions about why women go to the restroom in pairs. It's so the other gal can hold the door, hang onto your purse, and hand you Kleenex under the door!
Send this to all women that understand what bonding in the bathroom is all about! A Friend Is Like A Good Bra... Hard to Find... Supportive.... Comfortable ... Always Lifts You Up... Never Lets You Down, or Leaves You Hanging, And Is Always Close To Your Heart!!!
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Thanks a bunch!
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[remember; these are jokes…… g]
The latest telephone poll directed by Rick Perry, the Texas Governor, asked whether people who live in Texas think illegal immigration is a serious problem:
29% responded, "Yes sir, it is a serious problem."
71% responded, "No Senior, es una problema serio."
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The old lady stepped back and said, "well let me get you a fork, 'cause they cut off my electricity this morning."
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Downtown: 18th & Leavenworth, 345-5057, Mon-Fri 10-6, Sat 8-5,
Shucks Fish House & Oyster Bar (within the Seafood Market):
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As he was coming down the aisle, he would take two steps, stop, turn to the crowd, put his hands up like claws, and roar.
So it went, step, step, ROAR, step, step, ROAR, all the way down the aisle.
As you can imagine, the crowd was near tears from laughing so hard by the time he reached the pulpit..
When asked what he was doing, the child sniffed and said,
"I was being the Ring Bear.."
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Dear Abby,
A couple of women moved in across the hall from me. One is a
middle-aged gym teacher and the other is a social worker in her mid
twenties. These two women go everywhere together, and I've never seen a
man go into or leave their apartment. Do you think they could be Lebanese?
Dear Abby,
What can I do about all the Sex, Nudity, Fowl Language and Violence on
my VCR?
Dear Abby,
I have a man I can't trust. He cheats so much, I'm not even sure the
baby I'm carrying is his..
Dear Abby,
I am a twenty-three year old liberated woman who has been on the pill
for two years. It's getting expensive and I think my boyfriend should
share half the cost, but I don't know him well enough to discuss money with
him.
Dear Abby,
I've suspected that my husband has been fooling around, and when
confronted with the evidence, he denied everything and said it would never
happen again.
Dear Abby,
Our son writes that he is taking Judo. Why would a boy who was raised
in a good Christian home turn against his own?
Dear Abby,
I joined the Navy to see the world. I've seen it. Now how do I get out?
Dear Abby,
My forty year old son has been paying a psychiatrist $50.00 an hour
every week for two and a half years He must be crazy.
Dear Abby,
I was married to Bill for three months and I didn't know he drank until
one night he came home sober.
Dear Abby,
My mother is mean and short tempered I think she is going through mental
pause.
Dear Abby,
You told some woman whose husband had lost all interest in sex to send
him to a doctor. Well, my husband lost all interest in sex and he is a
doctor. Now what do I do?
The pharmacist looked sympathetically at him and said, "Look, I'm not trying to pry, but if it makes you sick, why do you keep doing it?"
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